First, who to address it to
A name shows you made an effort, and it takes only a few minutes to find on the job posting, the company’s website or LinkedIn. If you can’t find one, address the team rather than falling back on a stock phrase.
| What you know | What to write |
|---|---|
| The name of the hiring manager | Dear Ms. Rivera, |
| A name, but not how they prefer to be addressed | Dear Sam Rivera, |
| Only the team | Dear Customer Success team, |
| Nothing at all | Dear Hiring Team, |
What the first lines have to do
Your opening has two jobs: to say why you are a fit for this role, and to make the reader want the next line. The best openings do both by being specific, and that’s why a line that could be sent to any employer never works, however well it is written.
Before you write, look for one fact that only you could say. It might be a number from your last job, a problem the company mentioned in the posting or a conversation with someone who works there. That fact is your first line. The eight openings below are ways of using it.
8 openings you can adapt
Last year I cut our support backlog from 900 tickets to under 50 without adding staff. I would like to do the same for your customers as Head of Support at Brightline.
Dana Okafor, who leads your data team, suggested I write to you. We worked together for three years, and she thought my experience in fraud modeling might be useful for the role you have open.
When I read that Northwind is opening its first warehouse in Poland, I thought of the two sites I set up in Central Europe. The Operations Manager role looks like the part of that story I know best.
I have used Fielder to run my small landscaping team for three years, and it is the only software my crew has never complained about. I would love to help other small businesses get the same from it, as your new Customer Success Manager.
Your posting says the team is growing faster than its processes. That is exactly what I walked into at my last two companies, where I built the hiring and onboarding systems for teams going from 20 to 100 people.
After eight years of teaching teenagers how to care about fractions, I am confident I can teach your new customers how to use accounting software. I have spent the past year retraining in instructional design and would like to bring both to your team.
In my final year at university, I ran the social media for a student charity and raised its donations by 40% in one semester. I am looking for my first full-time role, and your Junior Marketing Assistant position is the one I would most like to do this in.
After two years caring for a family member, I am returning to product management, where I spent the previous seven years shipping billing tools. Your posting caught my eye because I have already solved the migration you describe.
First sentences to delete
Before
I am writing to apply for the position of Customer Support Specialist that I saw advertised on your website.
After
Your support team answers in under an hour, and I have spent four years helping a team like yours get there.
If your first sentence contains any of these, try again:
- “To whom it may concern”: it tells the reader that you have not looked.
- “I am writing to apply for”: they know that already.
- “My name is”: it is at the top of the page.
- “I am a hardworking, motivated professional”: anyone can say this, and nobody can check it.
- “I have always dreamed of working at”: it is about you, and rarely believed.
- “I may not have much experience, but”: do not begin by arguing against yourself.
What comes after the opening
A good opening has made a promise, so make sure the next paragraph delivers: one or two results that show it’s true, then why this company in particular. Our guide to writing a cover letter covers the whole structure, and these cover letter examples show complete letters for five common situations.
